The Three Lions Walk Into A Bar…
As if the English National Team wasn’t enough of a joke, John “Sorry Wayne” Terry is the captain again. Yep… the same guy that got the red card for giving a hard tackle to his best mate’s fiance, has the Three Lions’ armband back.
Does this upset me whatsoever? No. Why? Because it proves that this team really is a laughing stock, and I for one love watching them make fools of themselves. The way the English run their national team set-up, probably has something to do with why they have only won one major trophy in the last 40 years. Yet, they always claim they are great, and always claim they are big tourney favorites. They are delusional. It’s the footballing equivalent of The Jersey Shore. Just when you’re saying to yourself, “it can’t get more absurd from here,” it does.
What really makes this development all the more fun, is that Sir Fabio (The Fab) seems to think people have forgotten about JT’s foray into attacking territory. For Christ sake, it was less than a year ago! Terry even admitted that his appointment is probably an “unpopular” one. No matter what any England international tells me, it would be very hard for me to believe that there aren’t at least a handful of regulars that hate we he did to Wayne Bridge. Aside from dissent from the fans, that’s the real problem with the appointment from a managerial point-of-view.
The Fab (who gets paid £6 million a year for some reason) needs to realize that no matter how much time goes by, JT is still the dude that slept with his teammate’s fiance. But, alas, The Fab is indeed calling the shots. Bless his heart, he’s like all three stooges rolled into one giant Muppet. (Seriously… he looks like that Beaker guy.)
Anyway, thanks to our extensive network of top-level contacts throughout the sporting world, we’ve acquired a very sensitive list. This list highlights a number of leadership positions, in sporting and non-sporting fields, that The Fab has made some interesting suggestions for. Oh, boy:
THE FAB’S LEADERSHIP LIST – 2011:
- Head of the International Atomic Energy Agency: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
- Director of MLB Banned Substance Testing: Jose Canseco
- President of the ASPCA: Michael Vick
- Chair of the FA Disciplinary Committee: Joey Barton
- Head of the Premier League’s Dubious Goals Committee: Thierry Henry
- Mayor of New York City: John Rocker
- Director of FEMA: Michael Brown… wait, didn’t we already have that guy?
There was also a Chris Brown one that deals with a women’s organization, but I deemed it inappropriate. Anyway, if you hear about any more of The Fab’s suspect suggestions, feel free to leave it in the comments…